10.06.2024
The other day, someone asked me why I could do so many things. It is because I live in the family home. So, everything is done for me. That leaves me free to do whatever I want to do. And, as I explained that to that person, someone said ‘he is still a baby’. Obviously, the person that made that comment is a white person. They want to infantilise our culture which is considerably older than theirs. They want to treat us as the babies when in fact it is us that are the daddies.
I am not a baby. I can cook, clean, do the DIY and run a house by myself. I helped to do so until I was in my early twenties. And then, there were three professional housewives around, so why would I do that stuff any more? And besides which, if cooking and cleaning were so special, how comes anyone with even a smidgeon of a brain can do them? They are not accomplishments. Especially Western cooking which consists of just cutting stuff up and then putting it in an oven, microwave or frying it.
Do you know why this white guy called me a baby? At the time I just ignored it. But it bears thinking about. The reason he called me a baby is because of the white myth of independence in this atomised culture in which people think of themselves as something they call – fictitiously – an individual. He was judging me by the fictitious standards or autonomy that are in this culture.
Do you know that this Western idea of autonomy and individualism is fucking bullshit? Because the same people that say that bullshit are living with a partner. Together. In a house together. And when they get into a relationship with someone – I’m not going to dignify most of those relationships by calling them falling in love – they are living together all the time. Where’s your fucking autonomy then? The people that fall for that fucking bullshit fiction are living in a state of absolute delusion.
But, this is besides the point. You can’t stop someone being full of shit and believing that they are ‘an individual’. Because that justifies their selfishness, preoccupation with the self and their narcissism.
On to what I wanted to write. Why do I live at home with my parents?
One, it is my duty to look after them because they looked after me.
Two, I have been around my family my whole life and I am used to being around them all the time.
Three, the only person you can trust absolutely in this world is your mother. She will never betray you or cheat you. She is the only one that will fight for you.
Four, it is my right to live in the house with my parents and to have everything that they own. According to our culture and our laws. Why would I give up my rights? I don’t give up my rights for anyone or anything. Everything is mine. It is for me. That lifestyle that my father built for me is mine by right. No one can take it away from me. Someone said to me the other day that when you come into someone else’s country, you have to follow their rules and culture. No you don’t. I was born in my parent’s house. I am from this country. I did not choose to come here. I have always been here. I have chosen to follow the customs and traditions of people that love me and don’t hate me like the racists that rule in this country. The rule of law in this country is not objective and it is racist. It is a sin to follow it. Especially when it wants to destroy our culture and is based on oppressive imperialism and the injustice of the white, patriarchal middle class. It is your duty not to follow the rule of the law in this country. And to fight against the state and the state mentality. And the whole culture that goes with it. You can’t dispossess me.
Five, economically speaking, living with my family is the best choice. I can do whatever job I please and don’t have to live hand to mouth in precarity. I don’t have to let money rule over me. I am genuinely free to do whatever the fuck I fucking please. I live like a king. A god. Why would I give that up?
Six, this lifestyle is for my children. I can either raise them in poverty by myself with no help from anyone. Or I could bring them up with the education of kings and so they have everything that is needed to be a good person and to change the world. The choice is very simple.
Seven, living by yourself is lonely and bad for you mentally. You have no support. Anything could happen to you. You don’t have any security.
So, who is the fucking baby? Not me. Because mine is a rational decision. I think practically and in terms of my lifestyle. I don’t succumb to some bullshit ideology with its ideas of adulthood and its pretence at objectivity when it is a bullshit cultural formation.
Do you know something about white people? They separate their mothers from their children as infants. They don’t sleep in the same bed together. This is an unnatural state of affairs in world history. Whereas Asian and Indian mothers do sleep in the same bed with their children. We are connected to each other in a way that Western people are not. We don’t think of ourselves as individualised atoms.
And, over everything else, there is the principle. Why should I change my culture for anyone here? What fucking accommodation have you made for me, my parents and family and my culture? Why do we always have to bend? We are not going to. We keep ourselves alive. We follow the way. We’re not fucking babies. We are grown.
Whatever criticism anyone makes of me or us, it is us that are right. This has been the way for thousands of years. We are not going to let globalisation (i.e. Westernisation and neo-imperialism), migration and economic precarity dictate how we go about doing the things we do. In our culture, the family is the number one priority. And if you can’t stay in the family, you are an outsider and you can’t be trusted and you are not fit to be in the family.
Nobody can crush what we are. You can’t take The Tiger out of its jungle. Because then, the jungle doesn’t have its king.
diary of a lone man 